Back In Town
by GailTheFish
Summary: This is pre-administration and is AU. (Set about a couple of years before Toby went to LA to bring CJ onto the campaign so that won't happen the same way.) CJ's in New York and Toby relishes the opportunity to see his best friend.
1. Back in Town

******Okay so this started off because of an idea I rustled up as a one-shot a while back but I'm going to make it a story. I have this chapter and a later chapter (aforementioned one-shot) so far but I don't know yet how I'll progress to that so be patient with me. As usual, enjoy!**

******Edit: I discovered that You and I by Lady Gaga is the perfect song for this fic; it actually creeped me out because I came across the lyrics looking for another song. Anyway, the lyrics in italics now at the beginning of each chapter are from that song, which of course I do not own.**

* * *

**Part 1: Back in Town**

_It's been a long time since I came around_  
_Been a long time but I'm back in town_

Toby unlocked the door to his apartment and walked in, throwing his keys in their reserved dish and slamming his briefcase down on the couch. The sudden ringing of the phone caused him to jump slightly, he hated the shrill beeping. He made his way to the table where it sat and picked up the phone.

"Hello?" he answered monotonously.

"I almost hung up on you y'know, waiting about forever here." the irritated voice of CJ Cregg spilled into his ear.

"I just got home." he told her.

"Okay, Tobus." her voice was sarcastic but softer.

"How are you CJ?" he asked, his tone just slightly perkier.

"I got fired!" she complained, "apparently I'm too much of a smart-ass for Hollywood."

"Well you are." he told her.

"Yeah, whatever." she paused. "I'm in New York."

"Really?" he tried to hide his excitement.

"Yeah, my Emily's List contact told me of this guy running for mayor and I said I'd help out."

"Simpson?"

She sighed. "Nah, Geller."

"My money's on Simpson." he said casually.

"You've never won an election, plus Simpson's great on women's issues, so I'll take my chances." she teased.

He ignored her dig. "So you're in New York?"

"I am, Pokey. Can I see you?"

He tried to think of somewhere she hadn't been before. "Sure. You know Barry's on 28th?"

She hummed for a bit before replying. "No. I can find it."

"Can you meet me there in 40 minutes?"

"Yeah okay, you bringing Andi?" he winced at her name.

"Uhm, no. She's still at the office."

"Oh okay, see ya soon Pokey!" she hung up the phone before he could say bye.

Toby showered and changed into something more casual. He looked at his watch and realised he still had 20 minutes to spare before he left. Not wanting to hang about in his apartment much longer, he wrote a quick note for Andi - _"Gone out"_, and headed out to the bar to meet CJ.

Walking along in the warm September air, he was grateful he hadn't brought a jacket. He didn't really know why he was nervous to see her, she was the one person around whom he wasn't nervous. He'd started frequenting Barry's more and more recently, especially since Andi would come home at stupid hours now that her campaign was at full-speed. It was a quiet, comfortable bar where the barstaff knew when to leave you alone, so it was good enough for Toby.

* * *

He reached Barry's and walked in to find CJ already perched on a bar stool, a nearly empty Grasshopper in her hands.

"You're early." he pointed out as he sat beside her.

"So are you." she countered before pulling him into her arms. "I've missed you, Toby." He shivered at her breath on his neck.

"I've missed you too." he pulled away and attracted the attention of a bartender. "Jack Daniels, rocks. Please."

Toby turned to face CJ. "So what did you really do to get fired? Were you stealing?"

She took a sip before starting, "One of our clients dropped 10 places on a most influential list and apparently it was my fault." she waved her hand about airily, completely detached from the topic at hand.

"You belong in politics, Ceej. I don't know what you were doing there anyway." he took a sip of his scotch and savoured the warmth as it trickled down his throat.

"It paid well, I was going to buy a pool." she told him over the rim of her glass, other finger pointed.

"You'd only fall into it anyway." he sniggered, earning a shove in the arm.

"That was one time, Tobus." she snapped and he chuckled softly.

"You're clumsy as hell though."

"I can hold myself with the best of them." she said defensively before ordering another drink, martini this time.

"Should you mix your drinks?" he wondered.

"I had one grasshopper, I really don't think it'll kill me." she replied, taking a sip of the new drink.

"Okay, okay. I'm not carrying your too-drunk-to-walk-straight ass home though." he told her.

"Oh how I can always rely on you." she deadpanned before sitting up slightly, "How's Andi?"

He didn't really want to talk about Andi. "She's good. We're not." he said simply.

"What?" he didn't know why CJ seemed so shocked.

"We're going through a bit of a rough patch." Toby explained and CJ gestured at him to continue. "We're always arguing, nothing new. It's just worse."

"Oh I'm sorry Toby, I didn't realise." she patted his arm. "How's her campaign?"

"She doesn't want me involved, I mean why the hell wouldn't you want your husband involved? Especially when the Maryland 5th wouldn't elect a single female Democrat, she knows that. She's practically using me for the picture of domesticity."

She looked at him sadly, he hated her pity. "Wow, is she sleeping with her campaign manager or something?" CJ joked but then realised she'd hit a nerve. "Don't tell me she's sleeping with her campaign manager."

"I wouldn't put it past her." he said into his drink.

"Are things that bad?" CJ tried to meet his gaze but he just nodded at her before downing the rest of his drink.

"Come on, let's move to a booth." he ordered another drink and allowed her to drag him by the hand to a quiet booth in the back corner of the bar.


	2. Catching Up

**Part 2: Catching Up**

_He said, sit back down where you belong_  
_In the corner of my bar with your high heels on_

Toby casually slid into conversation with CJ about everything as usual - the current disaster that was the Republican White House, Toby's useless election candidate, how many times they'd end up in random bars having these conversations over the course of their years.

"You know, I'm surprised you didn't quit earlier." he told CJ in reference to her Hollywood PR job.

"It was a good job, it wasn't me but I needed a change. Emily's List wasn't doing it for me anymore."

"What happened to my favourite feminist?" he whined.

CJ giggled. "After this ruthless mayoral campaign you'll regret you ever asked."

"Where are you staying?" he wondered.

"I'm staying in a hotel for a few days but Clara, the one from Emily's List, is flying out from LA to work on some other campaign and she's letting me stay in her old studio apartment once she gets here." she explained.

"Then what?" he pressed.

"When? After the campaign?" Toby nodded in response.

"Jeez I've been here 5 minutes and you're already looking for ways to get rid of me!" she pouted.

"No, I'm curious. I like it when you're not on the opposite coast." he replied.

She finished off the remains of her drink as she looked at him, "Me too."

Propping up her feet in the space next to him, she relaxed back. "Does this place do food?"

"Nah." he sighed.

"Great, that's me getting shitfaced." she half-complained.

"Am I really such bad company that you need to get shitfaced?" he tilted his head curiously.

"Order us another round of drinks, Ziegler." she grinned, kicking him with the side of her foot to get up.

* * *

"So let me get this straight: you slept with the guy for interview access which it turns out you already had?" Toby snorted as CJ buried her head in her arms in embarrassment.

Their last round had gone down almost instantaneously and Toby was having fun quizzing CJ on her turbulent time at Triton Day.

"Yes." came the muffled response.

"Oh my god." he exclaimed and sniggered at the glare he received from beneath her hair.

CJ sat up and faced him again, "It was awful. He wasn't even the set liaison manager, it was a fucking intern."

Toby couldn't contain his laughter, "You're fucking with me right?"

"I wish I was." she groaned and he continued to laugh.

"How did you find out?"

"When someone told me some guy was walking around telling people he'd slept with the tall gal."

"You're unbelievable." he grinned, sitting back and taking a sip of his fourth scotch.

"I felt so stupid." She moaned.

"Nah that was Hollywood melting some of your brain cells." He retorted.

"I had to start drinking on my lunch breaks to cope, I felt that stupid." CJ reiterated.

"Ah, daytime drinking because of shitty jobs. I remember it like just this afternoon."

She sniggered. "You haven't suffered the embarrassment of everyone finding out you're sleeping with an intern though."

He watched her carefully. "You're forgetting a certain time and a certain someone."

"I am?" she questioned.

"You were an intern." Toby responded shyly.

"Oh yeah." she smirked into her glass.

"At least I never took advantage of your incompetence." he winked.

She drunkenly stuck out her tongue. "I think you helped create my incompetence."

"I did not." Toby defended.

"Yeah because hiding me out in your apartment to write press briefings on the sly wasn't incompetent?"

"Not at all." he shrugged. "Maybe the time you were blowing me in my office and Peterson walked in so you were stuck under the desk for 20 minutes while he tried to convince me to change debate topics."

"You're really not helping the reputation I seem to be cultivating." she told him, peering over the rim of her martini.

"That reputation's the one thing I'll take credit for." he flirted back.

"And who says you're not gonna make it big in politics?" CJ joked, oblivious to the dark of Toby's eyes as he watched her across the table.

* * *

"Isn't Andi going to be wondering where you are?" CJ asked Toby, her words slurring slightly.

Toby was drunk too, obviously not as drunk as CJ because he could somewhat hold his liquor, but nonetheless his voice babbled slightly.

"She's probably too busy to notice. Then she'll get home at 2am and remember she's married and then I'll get some angry phone call ordering me to get my ass home."

"I bet she worries about you." she contended.

Toby frowned. "I left her a note saying I was out, that's all she needs."

She scrunched up her face as she looked at him. "Call her, tell her you're out with me and that I think she needs to spend more time with her husband."

"Oh she'll love me for that." he said, a sarcastic tone and a grin playing at his lips.

"Do it. Can you smoke in here?"

"Yeah." he nodded and watched in surprise as she pulled out 2 cigars from her purse and rolled one across the table towards him.

"You're a cigar smoker now?" he asked as she lit her cigar.

She nodded through a puff of smoke, "Sometimes."

"It's hot." he smirked as he went to light his cigar with his own lighter.

"Does Andi smoke?" he mentally cursed at her incessant mentions of his wife.

Toby choked out a laugh. "God no. I get killed for smoking at home, she kicks me out on the balcony and refuses to come near me afterwards."

"Ouch." CJ quipped and took a long drag of her cigar.

He began blowing smoke rings at her. "At least it gives her a chance to sneak vodka."

She expressed mock astonishment. "You don't let her drink, Toby? What kind of place are you running over there?"

"She's a mean drunk after like 2 vodkas, so I tell her not to drink it, but she does it to get back at me for the cigars." he shrugged back.

"You're such a hypocrite." CJ pointed her cigar at him.

"How?"

"You're the meanest drunk I know!" she exclaimed.

"Thanks a lot." he replied; his pitch higher with surprise at her frankness.

"Not all the time." she countered, manoeuvring the hand holding her cigar so that she could take a sip of her martini with it. "Is she a bitch after the vodkas?"

He rubbed his beard, "One time she told me she wished we'd never married and then passed out on the sofa."

CJ almost put her cigar out in her drink. "You're kidding?!"

"Nope. I think she cleaned off the bottle that night." he stated.

"Did she say anything the next day?" she pressed.

"She couldn't remember a thing, threw up everywhere." he chuckled, slightly forced.

"Shit, Toby." CJ put out her cigar and gazed at him in a way he'd never seen from her before.


	3. Returning Home

**Part 3: Returning Home**

_I'd give anything again to be your baby doll_  
_This time I'm not leaving without you_

Eventually, Toby and CJ decided to call it a night. They paid their bill and headed out onto the dark street, his arm snaked around her waist to keep her from stumbling along the sidewalk.

"I really need some coffee." CJ groaned as they walked.

"You'll be up all night." Toby told her.

"So, nothing new there." She shrugged, her head finding his shoulder.

"Where's your hotel again?"

"Next to Grand Central."

"Okay."

They strolled along in comfortable silence, sharing another cigar for the journey. CJ holding it between her slender fingers, occasionally passing it through Toby's lips. Smoke rings were blown at each other, dark and playful in the moonlight.

After a while, CJ had sobered up and realised they were walking the wrong way.

"You're telling me this now?" Toby ran a hand over his head in exasperation as she stood before him.

A helpless expression ran across her face. "All these streets look the same to me!"

He muttered incoherently before motioning to her. "Come on, let's go then."

They continued to walk once Toby realised where her hotel actually was and finally ended up outside of it. The night was cooler and she shuffled on her heels to warm up beside him.

"And you're sure this is it?" he teased when they got there.

"Yes, Tobus." CJ retorted, enjoying the smile that was forming on his lips.

He pulled her into his arms and hugged her tightly, albeit briefly, before meeting her gaze.

"It's really good to have you back." Toby uttered, slightly bashful.

"You do realise now that I'm living here again that we'll be doing this," she gestured between them, "pretty much all the time."

"Yeah." A content smile on his face, he let her kiss his cheek before she turned into the entrance of the small hotel.

"Night, Toby." CJ called over her shoulder, flashing him a quick grin.

"Night, Ceej." He hollered back.

* * *

He meandered along back where they had came, making sure to take the necessary turns to his area. When he reached the street of his apartment, he noticed Andi's car parked outside and then cursed when he read the time on his watch – 2:08am.

Before Toby had a chance to close the door, the tired voice of Andi filled the room. "Where the hell were you?"

"I went out, okay?" he sighed, kicking off his shoes and comfortably inhabiting the couch.

"God, Toby. It's so nice of you to just spend every waking hour out of sight!" she exclaimed.

"Like you're ever home to notice!" he yelled back, exhausted.

Andi continued to stand and stare down at him. "Are you drunk?"

"No, I've had a few but I'm fine." He assured her with a wave of his hand, calmer now and still grateful for the fresh air on the extended walk from the bar.

"I'm going to bed." she announced bitterly, trailing off towards the bedroom.

"I'll be right in." he called back.

A few minutes later, he trundled into the bedroom where Andi was lying, already close to sleep. He quickly undressed before settling in beside her.

"I did leave you a note." He whispered into the darkness.

"Not the fucking point." She mumbled before rolling over and meeting his gaze.

"Sex?" Andi looked into his eyes and he had to suppress the bitter laugh at how pathetic they'd become. They'd just been arguing and yet she was asking for sex with a tone that was more suited to her asking him the time.

Toby captured her mouth in a soft kiss before pushing her onto her back, barely fondling her naked body.

Their sex was slow and monotonous as it had grown to be the rare times they had slept together the past few months. They could argue with the passion of blazing fires yet said passion never carried into the bedroom; it wasn't roaring or beautiful or even exciting anymore.

He came regardless because it had been so long, but he had to bite his lip to stop the utterance of CJ's name on his lips, the only woman with whom he could now associate passion and whom he secretly wished was the one laying beneath him.

He cursed inwardly at thinking such thoughts when he knew it would be harder to forget about her if she was going to be in his life more again. Rolling off Andi, he lay on his back, trying to rid the cycle of thoughts dominated by and associated with CJ. Andi sighed dejectedly at their lack of contact and moved further away from him in the bed, her back facing him. She quickly succumbed to slumber and Toby grew jealous of the way she was able to fall asleep so easily, his own mind eating him up.

* * *

The next morning, Andi had left before Toby could wake up.

He went about his day as usual and headed into work – lead strategist and speechwriter for Milton Jones, a candidate running for the New York 6th Congressional District. He was a dull Democrat who failed to jump on board to attack his opponent's poor reform strategies as well as being incapable of moulding his relatively interesting thoughts into the brilliant ideas they could be.

This angered Toby but he felt over the course of the campaign that he had at least managed to lead him out of the militant 'doing nothing' approach Milton had used early on. However they were still 12 points behind their Republican counterpart.

Around lunchtime, a shy intern knocked on his door. "There's a woman here for you."

"There is?" surprise was evident in his tone, Andi would never visit him at work.

"She's very tall." The intern whispered before walking off and he smirked as CJ came into his office.

"Hi, CJ." He smiled and gestured for her to sit on the chair in front of his desk.

"She called me tall didn't she?" CJ asked as she collapsed into the chair.

"You're surely used to that by now." He laughed back.

She glared at him. "Shut up. You free for lunch?"

"Yeah, come on." He grabbed his jacket off the back of his chair and ushered her out of the building.

"Where do you fancy?" CJ wondered as they walked along.

"There's a good sandwich place round the corner." Toby told her, indicating down the street as they turned.

The pair made their way into the quaint café and ordered coffee and club sandwiches before finding a table.

"Was Andi pissed last night? I didn't realise how late it was" CJ asked him once they'd discussed their mornings.

"Yeah." He exhaled.

"I take it you made it up to her." She grinned slyly.

He nodded vaguely, because his sex life was really not something he could endure discussing with her.

"Good boy." She smirked in response.

Toby's cell phone starting ringing and he groaned, listening to the irritated drone of Milton Jones on the other end. "I need to head back" he mouthed.

"Lunch is on me." She smiled and shooed him off. "See you later."

He waved as he turned, leaving CJ to finish her sandwich alone. She ignored the pang of jealousy that had risen in her stomach when talking about Andi with him. It was her own fault for talking about her, but bringing up his wife allowed her to set a distance between them, no matter how much they flirted. She paid the bill and headed back to her new office, dragging her heels dejectedly as she walked the streets.


	4. The Following Weeks

**Part 4: The Following Weeks**

_Somethin', somethin' about my cool Nebraska guy  
Yeah something about, baby, you and I_

Over the course of the following weeks, CJ had settled into an apartment, as assisted by Clara, and was making strides in her work for the Geller campaign. Toby on the other hand was watching as his candidate suffered through debate after debate no matter how much practice Toby imposed on him.

CJ had also been introduced to a guy named Jason by one of her colleagues and had slowly been pursuing a relationship with him; anything to shake off the jealous thoughts of Toby and Andi whose problems had considerably worsened as her campaign end and election loomed closer.

They continued to meet for lunch during work and for drinks after work, but the new existence of Jason in CJ's social life began to disperse the frequency of their time together – much to Toby's dismay.

"What do you see in him?" he'd asked her one evening when they'd been able to meet in a small pizza joint for a late dinner.

"He's lovely, Toby." CJ had defended softly, because he was.

He raised an eyebrow at her, "Lovely?"

"Yes. Lovely." The eyebrow remained quirked as she confirmed her statement.

"Is he good in bed?"

"Toby!"

"Is he?"

"We are not having this conversation."

"Why not?"

"Why do you care?" CJ asked.

"I'm just curious." He proclaimed between bites of his slice.

"We haven't actually had sex yet." She confessed, earning a startled look from Toby.

"After 3 weeks?" he questioned.

"Yes." She was growing more defensive, and a little self-conscious, having her sex life scrutinised by him. Why did he care if she was having sex? Moreover, why did she care about whether or not he cared?

"Okay." He scoffed and continued to eat.

CJ watched him from across the table, trying to figure out the complexity of his expression; she could see the cogs turning in his brain through the thought in his eyes.

* * *

"Jason, hi." CJ had dialled his number almost instantly after leaving Toby post-dinner; she ambled along the sidewalk with her cell phone in one hand and a cigarette in the other.

"Hi babe," Jason's smooth voice flowed down the phone. "Thought you were busy tonight?"

"Nah, just had dinner with Tobus." She replied coolly.

"Oh right. Wanna come over?" he asked, his tone becoming the ideal shade of seductive for CJ's mood.

"Yeah won't be long." She quickly hung up and walked the route to Jason's small apartment in Midtown.

He welcomed her in with a lingering kiss which she returned, pushing him against a wall once inside.

"Well hello to you too," he commented as they pulled away.

"Bedroom." She breathed, kissing him again. Jason led her to the room, a small dark space.

Feverish kisses and hands everywhere, CJ was a domineering lover with which he happily complied.

They later became entangled between the sheets, heavily breathing as they came down from their high.

"Jesus, CJ, you're good." He groaned, attempting to wrap an arm around her. She edged away and went to find her clothes. "You're not staying?"

"I'd love to, but I have an insanely early start in the morning." She kissed him quickly, albeit tenderly, once she was dressed and grabbed her purse. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"See ya, babe." Jason called after her as she exited his apartment.

CJ smoothed down her hair as she headed out onto the sidewalk and made her way back to her apartment, resisting a slight urge to call Toby.

As she walked, she noticed an elegantly dressed redhead across the street and realised it was Andi, Toby's Andi. She made a succinct effort to remain out of sight, which was hard given her stature, but felt necessary nonetheless.

They had gotten along on the few times they were introduced but she always sensed Toby liked to keep them separate given his and CJ's past, even though she had no idea if Andi was aware of that. With these thoughts playing on her mind, she kept her head down as she paced on home.

* * *

The beginning of November and Election Night soon came around. Andi's campaign was looking incredibly successful based on her polling, Toby still out of the loop with her as he maintained the dreary strategy of Milton Jones' campaign. CJ's role in her mayoral campaign was also strengthened by the end.

_Toby_

"Jesus Christ, where is he?!" Toby yelled through the small campaign headquarters on the night of the elections, looking for his candidate.

"He left." a young intern piped up.

"He what?!" he bellowed.

"I heard him yelling about how he'd lost anyway so there was no point hanging around."

"You've got to be fucking kidding me!" Toby cried, not really aimed at the intern anymore.

A mere half an hour later, the election was called in favour of Jones' opponent, Richard Allemore; thus, another election defeat for Toby Ziegler.

_CJ_

"Claudia Jean!" Martin Geller's voice boomed around the office space, "Feeling lucky?"

"Sir, I've told you hundreds of times, just call me CJ. And I never tempt fate, a friend of mine would have my head."

"I see, but our polls are looking good aren't they?"

"Yes, sir." she smiled back.

It wasn't long before Martin Geller was announced the newly elected mayor of New York City, CJ elated that her hard work had finally paid off.

_Andi_

"I am so nervous, should I be this nervous?" she was babbling to one of her advisors who was fixated on a small TV in the corner of the room.

"Yes, but you're about to be elected into the House of Representatives, so no time for nerves now!" was the reply from her bubbly worker.

"Calm down, Hazel. I haven't won yet."

The victory was declared soon after, Andi ecstatic with the latest move in her political career.

"And the victorious candidate for the Maryland 5th Congressional District is one Andrea Wyatt!" Andi's chief campaign official Sandy Londale shouted in celebration.

"Maryland!" Andi cried in response, eliciting chorused cheers from her staff.

* * *

Toby found himself in a bar after leaving the sombre atmosphere that was the abandoned Jones headquarters; he'd called CJ round about midnight as he wanted company and she willingly obliged to join him.

His spirits were yet again dampened as she walked in with Jason, whose hand was placed rather distastefully placed on her ass.

"Did Andi win?!" CJ asked him immediately as they reached him.

"Yeah." he replied solemnly and Jason turned to CJ quizzically.

"Who?"

"Toby's wife, Andi. She's just been elected Congresswoman of the Maryland 5th!" she beamed.

"Oh dude congratulations, that's gotta be hot having a cool wife. Although I only really pay attention to the politics of Nebraska." Jason said to Toby, whose face remained unanimated.

"You two want drinks?" Toby wondered as they continued to hover next to his bar stool.

"I'm taking off." Jason explained, "I think CJ's going to keep you company though." he continued, squeezing her ass playfully. Toby wanted to vomit at his violating manner.

CJ kissed him before he left and then planted herself on the stool next to Toby.

"Why aren't you celebrating with Andi?" she questioned as he called a bartender to order her a drink.

"She called, said she was out late with her friends. Who am I to intrude?" he rambled, slightly drunk.

"Tobus, you two really need to sort things out." she replied.

"She's going to DC to set up her offices tomorrow."

"You're moving?!" CJ almost cried.

"No, no. Andi's getting a small place there, she'll split her time between here and DC." he stated.

Toby hadn't explained the extent of their problems to CJ, even though she knew things were rough. He decided to change the topic. "So Jason's a Nebraska guy?" he smirked.

"What's wrong with that?" she replied, taking a sip of her scotch.

"Nothing." he contested quietly. "You're going to get drunk with me tonight aren't you?"

CJ grinned at him playfully. "You're already halfway there, Ziegler. I'll catch up though, don't you worry."


	5. Election Night

**Part 5: Election Night**

_You taste like whiskey when you kiss me, oh_  
_I'd give anything again to be your baby doll_

Toby and CJ found themselves both in the far stages of intoxication as they sat in the bar. It was quietly humming with the vibe of fellow late-night drinkers but they were able to retain an intimate atmosphere in their booth.

"So Andi winning, how is this going to change things?" CJ asked him, shuffling napkins on the table.

"She'll live in her little DC place as she pleases and then New York will be here when she wants to be a wife." He murmured.

"I'm not going to lie to you, Toby. Your marriage is sounding shit to me right now."

"Yeah well you're not the only one."

"Didn't we cover how the Maryland 5th wouldn't elect a single female Democrat?"

"We did."

"Then why aren't you doing it all with her? Moving to DC permanently and doing this properly."

"She doesn't want me there, doing that like I'm following her lost-puppy style."

CJ looked intently at him, fingers no longer playing with the napkins.

"You've been lying to me haven't you, Toby?

"Excuse me?"

"Are you and Andi breaking up?"

He sighed, a hand over his beard and eyes avoiding hers.

"I think we're separating, a trial separation while she's setting up in DC."

"Oh, Toby…"

"Don't, CJ. It's what we need."

"Why didn't you tell me this?"

"You're busy these days," he paused hesitantly, "with Jason."

"I'm always here for you though. You're my best friend Toby and I want to know when your marriage is on the fritz and I don't want you thinking that me having a stupid boyfriend means I'm any less bothered about your troubles. You know I'll always care for you and that means you should talk to me about things."

He shrugged off the "stupid boyfriend" comment because he couldn't handle reading into it too much and sighed. "I don't talk about things, CJ, that's not what I'm about."

"And you think I don't know that? You do talk to me though."

"I know."

"You should've told me about Andi."

"Well now I have."

"Okay."

"Okay."

"I'm sorry."

"Yeah."

"Have you talked about it?"

"Separating?"

She nodded slightly.

"Not since we first mentioned it."

"When was that?"

"Last week."

"But she wants to stay together technically to avoid losing her political status?"

"She does."

"You deserve a lot more than this, you know."

* * *

Toby wished in that moment he could just confess his feelings for her, his admiration and his jealousy over Jason because he'd rather endure any little spark of something with her than attempt to rebuild a broken marriage with Andi.

CJ sometimes wanted to tell him something similar, to tell him how much Jason was a mere substitute for him. A way to exercise the thoughts that played on her mind and to feel what she felt for Toby, only through a filter of another man - an acceptable outlet that would avoid ruining their friendship.

Neither one could muster up the courage to speak anything regarding these hidden feelings. Instead, CJ wrapped her long fingers around the scotch glass before her on the table, lightly tapping as she looked across at him.

"Let me sit there." She nodded her head at the space beside him.

He didn't verbally respond, merely shifting so that she could slide into the spot next to him in the booth. Both ended up with their legs propped up on the opposite bench, feet knocking each other's only slightly now and again.

"Milton Jones actually left the offices before the election was called." Toby admitted with a chuckle.

"No way?" CJ turned to look at him, both incredulous and amused.

"Yep." He nodded.

"And you had to pick up the pieces?"

"Call me the fixer."

She snorted at him before looking into her drink. "I don't know what to do now the election's finished."

"How about permanent political PR work?"

"Where else would you find me?" CJ asked rhetorically.

"You're on the back of a successful election campaign; you've done well for yourself in politics and the media. You can do a lot with that."

"You're right, yeah. What are you going to do?"

"I got an offer to do some political operative work for the state office."

"That's great, you're doing it right?"

"Of course, nothing else going on now."

"I love your enthusiasm sometimes.

"Shut up."

Toby leaned back and rested an arm against the back of the booth behind her shoulder. Without really noticing, CJ settled back into him and let out a breath.

"I'm sorry about Andi. I really am."

"I know."

* * *

The pair continued to sit, talking aimlessly, arms winding up around one another.

"You're so much nicer than Jason." CJ said out loud, apparently at the stage of drunk where thoughts weren't considered before spoken.

"I am?"

"Yeah. I think he's turning into a bit of a douche."

"You've just noticed?" Toby smiled.

She shot him a glare, slightly glassy from the alcohol. "He's not that awful."

"CJ, I can't remember a time when you were with him and his hand wasn't superglued to your ass."

"I have a nice ass." She retorted defensively.

"I know you do." He smirked at her before continuing. "But it's pretty nauseating."

"You jealous?" she grinned.

"Totally, Ceej." He squeezed her waist and his lips quirked upwards as to say 'I'm meant to be joking with you but I'm too drunk to care that I'm not'.

"Andi never let you feel her up in public?" she teased.

"Andi wouldn't let me feel her up in private."

"You poor, deprived man."

"I find consolation in the fact that her ass isn't as fantastic as yours."

CJ swatted him on the head, earning an agitated groan. "You shouldn't talk about me like that, Tobus."

"Why not?" he asked innocently.

"Andi wouldn't like it." She challenged with a slight frown.

"She doesn't like anything I say or do, CJ." He told her, turning to look into her eyes.

"She's more clueless than I thought." she said quietly.

"I think you're the jealous one."

"Bite me, Ziegler."

They sat in silence for a few moments, absorbing the comfortable and almost charged atmosphere between them.

Toby looked down at CJ, whose head was now resting on his shoulder.

"We get drunk far too often."

"You're such a lightweight."

She looked up to dart a steely glare his way, and their eyes met suddenly.

"I am not."

"Your eyes are all twinkly."

"Toby Ziegler just said twinkly? You, the symbol of intellect, used twinkly as an adjective? I think we know who the lightweight is here."

"Stop talking." He told her, even though he was enjoying how worked up over petty things she got when she was drunk.

"Why?" she asked airily but instead of responding, he simply pressed his lips to hers.

The taste of scotch and the tenderness of his kiss overwhelmed CJ; she melted into the moment before a small sense of reality hit her.

"We can't." she muttered, pulling back, and realising they were still sat in each other's arms, moving away.

"Don't say that." Toby's voice was almost a whisper, low and rough.

"You're married!" she exclaimed but was interrupted by his mouth on hers once more, a deeper kiss.

They kissed for a few minutes, tongues entangled and hands finding each others, before anxiously breaking away.

"I should go." She mumbled softly, slowly unlacing their fingers.

"CJ…" he began to protest but she stood up, placing some bills on the table.

"No Toby, I need to go."

He watched her walk out, sighing in defeat and then groaning as he leaned back, a drowsy feeling overcoming him.

CJ walked out of the bar and into the bitter night air, his scotch lingering still on her lips and tears gradually beginning to stream down her cheeks.


	6. Bad Blood

**Part 6: Bad Blood**

_Somethin', somethin' about just knowing when it's right  
So put your drinks up for Nebraska_

She reached home, the fresh air sobering her up, and collapsed straight into bed.

A knocking from outside started pounding on the door minutes later, and she figured at first it would be Jason wanting a late night visit but the face of Toby appeared on the other side. "Hi, CJ."

"What do you want?" she quietly asked - any sense of annoyance absent from her voice.

"You ran out on me."

"Which is perfectly understandable since you kissed me and you're married."

"Separated technically, and I want you." CJ's heart fluttered ever so slightly.

"You're just drunk, Toby."

"I'm not saying it because I'm drunk."

"We shouldn't be having this conversation."

"I want to talk."

She sighed in spite of wanting to talk too "Go home, get some sleep."

"No, let me in."

The look in his eyes was pleading and she couldn't refuse him then.

"Come on." She stood aside so he could walk in before she locked the door; walking into the living room, he was seated on her small couch rubbing his head in his hands.

"It was a mistake." CJ told him as she sat beside him, not daring to meet his eyes. "There's Andi and Jason and…" she didn't know how to finish.

"It wasn't a mistake." He responded.

"How can you say that?" she argued tiredly. "It's not right."

"What isn't? You and me? The fact I'm married means nothing, it stopped meaning anything to Andi a long time ago, and are you seriously telling me you're happy with Jason?"

"It's not simple, Toby."

"You think I'm unaware?" he paused to take in her emotional stare. "It's not an impulsive decision here, Ceej."

"I know I just…" she stopped, running a hand through her hair, expression weary. "It's just too hard to think about."

"Us?"

"We wouldn't work, not now. Can you leave? I'm tired."

"I'm not leaving."

"Toby!" She whined in protest.

Toby stood up because ignoring her wishes didn't feel like something he ought to do at this point, and looked down at her. "Fine. But we're not done with this conversation okay?"

"Okay."

* * *

Once he had left, CJ attempted to shake off his words.

She loved him, but it was never enough, especially now that he was married. It astounded her that she was even considering thoughts like this given the fact he was married. It never crossed her mind that he could still feel anything for her; even though their relationship was formed on a strong chemistry and frequent flirtations, it never occurred that he could still harbour feelings that were seemingly buried in their past.

No matter what he said, she'd determined that it was because he was intoxicated and reeling from the trial separation with Andi, not because Toby Ziegler was still in love with his best friend who wanted nothing more in the world than for his words to be true.

The next day passed without reference, Toby's confidence wavering in the harsh light of a sober day.

They met for coffee the day after that, unable to conjure up conversation past the job Toby had started for the state office and CJ's luck in finding a media consultant role that mixed political lobbying with intense PR work.

A week later, the time had passed still without a mention of that night and that kiss.

"Toby Ziegler's here for you." CJ's new assistant, Martha, told her one afternoon.

"Send him in." she smiled back and watched as Toby nervously shuffled into her small office.

"Nice digs." He commented, wandering towards her desk.

"What brings you by?"

"It turns out we need some media consultation."

"So you came to me?"

"Best in the business." He quipped, a ghost of a smile on his lips.

They eventually came to an agreement that would meet the needs of Toby's clients in the state office and the media company; it also meant that the pair would be working alongside each other once again.

* * *

Several days later, the collaboration began and the fiery arguments soon followed. CJ and Toby's working relationship had always been intense, having built the foundation of where they were today.

"Where the hell is she?!" one day he had stormed through towards CJ's office and found it empty, scouring the halls for her.

"I'm right here, Ziegler!" she had yelled back, coming out of the ladies room.

"How do you explain this?!" he thrust a report in her face, combinations of his black scribbled cursive and her red loopy scrawl marking the margins.

"I was making notes!"

"You practically rewrote the report!"

"It was how to make it more press friendly!"

"If you had issues with it from any perspective, you should've talked to me about it!"

"What the hell is it with you and talking recently?!" she screamed back.

"Why are you trying to my job?!"

"I'm not! I'm doing mine!"

"Your job isn't to completely oust your co-workers!"

"Would you listen to yourself, Toby? It's one fucking report, get over yourself!"

"I swear to God, CJ…"

"What?!"

"If the report was so shitty for the press, you didn't have to be so calculating and rewrite it for me!"

"I wasn't doing that! I was amending it!"

"So that's what they're calling it these days? I know how to do my job in case you weren't aware!"

"I know you do, I wasn't trying to be manipulative! Get that through your thick skull!"

"Next time, speak to me about it okay? Don't go behind my back!"

"I wasn't going behind your back, my boss told me to read through it some more! You know we can't screw up on this!"

"I know that! I'm fully aware of it!" he paused, the seething temper cooling, "I'm not prepared to let that happen. Just work with me."

"Jeez, what were we doing before?" she retorted bitterly.

Toby glared daggers at her, a look she had grown to meet and take down over the years.

He then turned out and left without so much as a word.

* * *

Later that day, CJ returned from a meeting to find a cup of coffee on her desk. Walking over, she picked it up and noticed a post-it stuck to the lid.

"_What's done cannot be undone." _Read Toby's handwriting and she choked out a laugh as she pulled it off, his Shakespearean apology a common trait by now.

As she sipped at the hot coffee, the phone rang.

"Get the coffee?" Toby mumbled.

"Macbeth, Tobus?"

CJ could practically see him shrug on the other end. "Felt appropriate."

"Drink with me later?" their disputes were usually forgotten pretty soon afterwards.

"Can't, Andi's in town." He sighed.

"Oh, okay. See ya."

"Bye, CJ."

She hung up and recommenced the work piling up on her desk, before Jason stopped by.

"Hi!" she was surprised to see her boyfriend standing there, his presence completely forgotten for numerous hours.

"Hey babe. Apparently you've been causing trouble, yelling in the halls." He grinned, sliding into the chair in front of her desk.

"Toby's fault." She defended under her breath, reminiscent of a child.

"That's why I'm here." Jason explained.

"What? Toby?"

"Yeah." He paused hesitantly. "Are you in love with him?"

"What?!" her face grew shocked, voice high.

"Just tell me the truth, CJ."

"Why are you asking me this?"

"I barely see you these days, you're always with him. I used to accept it because I know he's married, but then I thought that might not necessarily stop him. I feel like a third wheel when I'm with you two, and that's if I'm lucky to be around you at all."

"You've got it completely wrong." CJ assured him, trying to keep the quiver out of her voice.

"I'm not stupid, CJ. I know I'm not as intelligent as you two, but I can tell when my girlfriend is completely indifferent to me."

"Jason…"

"Don't, look. I really like you, I do, but this isn't going to work out." Jason stood up to leave.

"You're breaking up with me?" she asked in confusion.

"Yeah. See ya around, Claudia Jean."


	7. Time For Change

**Part 7: Time For Change**

_Sit back down on the couch,  
Where we made love the first time_

It wasn't a complete heartbreak to be dumped by Jason, but a part of her did like him and she didn't know what to do – she knew she couldn't go to Toby because he didn't care for Jason and Andi was with him tonight anyway.

CJ decided to go out to a bar, not much different from every other night, but drinking alone had a melancholy feel to it.

She ordered her second scotch and leaned onto the bar where she sat, already tired after a few sips of her drink.

A quarter of an hour or so passed when she felt a presence behind her, then a light tapping on her shoulder. "CJ Cregg?"

"Yeah?" she turned to see the face of Andi Wyatt and inwardly groaned, but was also shocked.

"Hey! I thought it was you!" she beamed at the sitting CJ. "I didn't know you were in town."

It then hit CJ that Toby must not have mentioned that she'd been living in New York to Andi. It startled her slightly that even though they were having problems, he'd never told his wife that his best friend was back in the city.

"Yeah I am." She chose not to develop the subject. "How are you, Andi? And congratulations by the way!" she feigned enthusiasm, gesturing for the woman to sit.

"Thanks!" she nodded her head slightly, "No, I'm not staying. I'm heading home, I've been in DC a lot recently so I'm surprising Toby tonight." She paused for breath. "I was just catching a quick drink with an old colleague when I noticed you over here."

CJ could sense the false optimism in her tone, knowing fine well how bad things really were in the marriage.

"Oh well you better be off then, it's been lovely to see you again!" CJ spoke cheerfully.

"You too. Bye CJ!" Andi grinned, almost forced, and headed out of the bar.

She leant back and thanked God that the guilt of kissing Toby hadn't overwhelmed her, but then realised Toby was the reason she was here in the first place. Their stupid chemistry had led Jason to dump her, even if it was for the best.

* * *

8 scotches later, CJ had struck up conversation with a boring lawyer who didn't seem so boring after so much alcohol, and it seemed decided that they were going home together.

She hailed a cab to her place, Dean the boring lawyer in tow; he kept trying to kiss her neck, but she was still too sad to be fully enthused about making out in the back seat.

They reached her apartment and she was furious to find Toby standing on her doorstep.

"What the hell are you doing here, Ziegler?!" she cried, a frightened Dean cowering at the bottom of the steps.

"Who's that? What happened to Jason?" he queried, completely confused by the new man.

"I'm going to go, nice meeting you." Dean spoke up awkwardly, trailing back down the street.

"Look what you've done, you scared off Dean!" CJ exclaimed, throwing her arms up.

"Where's Jason?" he repeated.

"We broke up! Because of you!" she cried.

"Because of me?" the caution in his voice was apparent.

"He's got it into his head that I want you, not him."

Toby scratched his beard, his eyes playful. "Well don't you?"

"You're married, Toby! Speaking of which, aren't you meant to be seeing Andi tonight? I bumped into her by the way; it's nice that you didn't tell your wife that your best friend lives in the same city now."

"I wasn't going to tell her you're here now." He argued quietly.

"Why not?"

"So she won't know to get suspicious of me doing things like this." He leaned in and kissed her softly, his hands cupping her cheeks.

CJ looked back, surprised. "Get inside."

He smirked but she shot him a scowl and his face became subdued as he followed her into her apartment.

"Why did you come here, Toby?" she questioned, arms folded across her chest once inside.

"Andi basically came to pack up more of her stuff, not really the romantic night I'd envisaged." His voice dripped with sarcasm.

"You're not romantic anyway." She quipped back and Toby smiled into his beard.

"Yeah."

* * *

CJ stared at him, "Why are you really here?"

"Your company isn't a good enough reason anymore?"

"You kissed me, again!" she near shouted.

"That's because you're hot when you're mad." Toby shrugged.

"You need to stop kissing me like that." She frowned back.

"I'll kiss you any way you like."

"Don't be cute with me, Tobus."

"I'm here now, can I have a drink?" he wondered.

"You can, as you can see I'm already a bit sloshed so I'll sit this one out."

"Lightweight."

"Shut up."

CJ brought him some scotch and chose to pour a glass for herself anyway. They sat beside each other on the couch in comfortable silence.

"I'm sorry about Jason." He sighed into the space between them.

"Yeah." She replied. "He was nice."

"He wasn't."

"I'm sick of you doing this."

"Doing what?"

"Jeopardising my relationships!"

"You're calling what you had with the guy out there a relationship?" he laughed.

"No, but I can't see a guy without you being there insulting him and then said guy thinks you're their competition and they get fed up. I wish you wouldn't."

"It's not my fault you pick losers who aren't me." He said, lips quirked.

Toby watched her face as she composed a response. "I'm not supposed to pick you."

He moved in and kissed her again, a passionate kiss that left them both breathless. Their scotches soon became discarded on the coffee table as they continued to make out, hot and heavy as their bodies pressed against one another. CJ was pushed against the couch, Toby's body hovering over hers as the fervent kissing grew even more intense.

"You're gorgeous, you know that?" he breathed against her neck, his mouth exploring her collarbone.

She groaned into his touch and sighed contently in response.

Their mouths met once more: tongues struggling for control and lips sweet with scotch.

His hands reached her ass, pulling her closer and CJ looked up at him, eyes shining. "Do you want this?"

"Are you kidding me? Of course." He drawled.

* * *

She kissed Toby, whose hands worked to pull down her tight jeans beneath him while she moved to pull off her jumper. He took the opportunity to shrug out of his own clothes before they hurriedly returned to their positions, resuming the zealous kissing and exploring of one another's bodies.

They eventually made love, fast albeit fierce and beautiful; they reconnected instantly with the memories of their bodies ostensibly still engraved.

As they came down from their high, Toby wrapped CJ in his arms. Cramped on her couch, she savoured their familiarity and rested her head against his chest, his heart beating beneath her ear making her feel even closer to him.

He began kissing her hair with a tenderness that completely bewildered her.

"You never used to be like this." She muttered against his skin.

"It's different now." He answered.

"We just started an extramarital affair, it was bound to be."

"That's not what this is."

"Well you ought to be home right now, Andi will be wondering where you are."

"Don't talk about Andi, not now." He moved so that they were sitting up, legs entangled.

"So you're staying?"

"I don't have to."

"You can, it's late."

He simply hugged her waist in response and they sat without a work spoken between them for a while, merely enjoying the intimate presence.

"Can we go to bed? I'm freezing out here." Toby growled some time after.

"Yeah, come on." She dragged him by the hand, leading him into the bedroom where they soon succumbed to sleep.


	8. Moving Forward

**Part 8: Moving Forward**

_Somethin', somethin' about the chase (six whole years)  
I'm a New York woman born to run you down_

When CJ woke the next morning, she wasn't surprised to find Toby was gone.

She climbed out of bed, slightly disheartened with herself; once in the kitchen she noticed the smell of fresh coffee and how he'd left a note saying _"Sorry, Andi called"_ on the fridge.

Sighing, she trawled back to bed with her steaming mug of coffee, relieved it was a Sunday. The stress of thinking about the fact she'd slept with Toby was a bit much: she wanted him more than anything but they couldn't be together when he was married and she didn't want to be just a mistress. It was degrading and they were too close to be built on sex that way.

Having finished her coffee, she drifted back to sleep for the rest of the morning.

Toby on the other hand faced a gruellingly boring morning in Andi's presence.

Breakfast was eaten in silence on his arrival; she didn't even question his whereabouts of the previous night, much to his relief.

"I'm going back to DC for the foreseeable future." She told him as he read the newspaper.

"How long is that?"

"I don't know, Toby." Her voice was tired and she sighed, easing back into the silence.

It was a long time before either one spoke up.

"I need to go into work. See you whenever, I guess." He stood up and kissed her cheek out of courtesy.

"Bye." Andi uttered as she watched him leave.

Once outside, Toby went to call CJ but found her voicemail instead. Not wanting this conversation over the phone, he continued to journey into work as planned for the day.

* * *

That night, Toby invited CJ to his apartment.

"Why on earth am I here?" she asked through gritted teeth as he opened the door to her. "Did you seriously think this was a wise idea?"

"Andi's gone." He told her, calming her down.

"Oh. Back to DC?"

"For the foreseeable future." He quoted with a smile.

"So you're taking advantage of it?" she questioned.

"I wanted to talk to you."

Toby ushered her to sit at his dining table, where glasses of scotch were already placed.

She grinned as she removed her coat, "You're being quite the hostess tonight, Tobus."

He simply glared before sitting across from her.

"Why do you want to talk?" CJ wondered, knowing pretty well what he wanted to discuss.

"Last night." He affirmed.

"It was a mistake, we should've have done it." She muttered quickly.

"No, it wasn't." Toby paused to take a sip of his drink, ""I want to be with you, CJ." He murmured quietly.

Her demeanour became defensive. "I am not turning into one of those women."

"You wouldn't be." He countered.

"I'm not getting involved in your marriage this way; I'm not being your mistress."

"Again, you wouldn't be."

"We both know that's not true."

"I don't see you as the other woman. I won't. " His fingers clutched his glass tighter as he downed more of his scotch.

"I'm setting myself up for heartbreak if I become whatever the hell it would be then." She couldn't meet his eyes as she spoke.

"Listen to me: I want to be with you. My marriage is meaningless now, merely a political façade for my petty wife."

"We can't, Toby." She whispered.

"Why not?" he challenged.

"It's too complicated."

"You like me, don't you?"

CJ nodded, eyes still not meeting his gaze.

"And I like you. I don't see an issue here."

She choked out a laugh, "Andi?"

"She won't know, she won't care. Can we give this a chance?"

"It's the worst idea you've ever had." She said warningly.

"So that's a yes?"

CJ's lips curved upwards. "Yes, Tobus."

"I don't know why you tried so persistently, fucking me like you did last night would've done the trick." She sniggered as he made his way over to her, hugging her shoulders from behind and inhaling her soft tresses.

* * *

They then had sex for the second time since reconciling, both immersed in the passion and relief of finally allowing themselves to admit to their feelings.

"I'm telling you, this is weird." CJ sat against the headboard, sheets wrapped around her as Toby brought in the Chinese they'd ordered afterwards.

"It's romantic." He said plainly, handing over a carton of noodles. "Dinner and drinks, not too shabby for a first date."

"Dinner usually comes before sex." She reminded him with a smirk.

He shoved her in the arm playfully as he sat beside her. "I'm not conforming to society's standards of dating; you can go find another Jason otherwise, if you want it all like that."

"I'm right where I want to be." She said, tone earnest and a warm smile playing at her lips.

They kissed between bites of their food, before Toby fed her a piece of his chicken.

CJ savoured the food but suddenly, out of nowhere, grimaced and got up out of the bed. "Don't, this is so clichéd."

"You're leaving?" he asked, tone astounded as he watched her move around to bedroom to locate her clothes.

"Yes. No. I don't know, should I? Toby this is seriously weird. You're married! I like you of course I do but we're not a couple, not boyfriend-girlfriend material. It's going to take some getting used to okay?"

"Sudden change of heart don't you think?" he asked, trying to hide the offence he felt.

"Probably." She sighed while pulling on her top.

"Stay the night at least." Toby insisted, gesturing to the bed he was still sat upon.

"Not tonight." CJ replied and moved to where he sat. "Thank you for the food though."

He kissed her, pulling her close to him. "It's fine, Ceej."

"I'll call you tomorrow." She kissed him again before throwing an apologetic look as she walked out.

Toby groaned as he followed seconds later, locking the door once she'd left.

CJ had strolled onto the dark street and made her way back to her own apartment, silently cursing herself for leaving so soon. Internally, however, she was glad that things were starting to develop the appearance of what she had wanted for longer than she'd care to admit.

* * *

Toby would surely see past this slight hitch, right? It wasn't that she didn't want it to be like that, he was damn sweet when he was trying to cute and romantic, but they weren't those people; seriously not the overly affectionate couple. Intimacy wouldn't be an issue, but perhaps they had gone too soon with this? She tried to subdue her thoughts as she entered her home and collapsed into the too-empty bed.

Slightly aroused still, CJ allowed herself to masturbate to the fresh thoughts of Toby's hands exploring her body, his cock deep inside of her. She moaned into her dark bedroom, wishing the fingers penetrating her were accompanied with the soft albeit rough bristle of his beard and his hot breath on her thighs that preceded his slick tongue.

Coming with a heavy whimper and sinking into the sheets, she almost questioned her previous decision and nearly moved to start a return to Toby's place. The exhaustion of her pleasure overwhelmed her though and soon overcame any rational thoughts she would have.

Sleep would've followed if it wasn't for the beeping of her phone that rang through the apartment. Deciding to let it screen was her favourite option, not wanting to move, and the voice of Toby filled the room.

"Hey, CJ. I'm guessing you're ignoring me or asleep, or screening in which case pick up."

He paused for several seconds. "No? Okay. I'm sorry, yeah. If I've overwhelmed you, which I may have done, we can slow this down. I know it's different and not what we thought would happen but I want to make this work. I hope you do too, I've been happier since you came back…" his voice trailed off before regaining some confidence. "Okay, I've had some scotch since you left and I'm going to stop confessing my feelings to an answering machine now. Bye."

CJ suppressed a tiny giggle as he hung up the phone and the room fell silent again. Maybe she could live with a slightly uncharacteristic Toby if he was going to make her feel like this all over again.


	9. Girls Having Fun

**Part 9: Girls Having Fun**

_It's been two years since I let you go  
I couldn't listen to a joke or rock 'n' roll_

It took slightly longer than anticipated, but CJ and Toby managed to rectify the initial awkwardness of transitioning into being somewhat a couple. The things between them, it turned out, weren't all that different from before: they still went out for drinks all the time, met for lunch as they had done so many times in the past few months, and relied on each other insatiably.

It was only the kissing, sex and more couple-y aspect of the relationship they had to adjust to, and while it had been done so lovingly their first time around, it was surprising for them to see they had changed, grown.

More than anything for CJ, it was getting her head around the fact that she'd ended up with Toby again. Once he'd started seeing Andi and got married, she thought she'd lost him forever. It bewildered her constantly that while his marriage had turned to nothingness, he had wanted her back and feelings resurfaced, or seemingly never changed at all.

Toby, on the other hand, was so scared of losing CJ again that he didn't know how to proceed without a caution of messing things up. It was so early on for them that he wasn't sure how she'd want them playing things out. He seemed to be doing fine, though: they were closer than ever and he knew he was falling in love with her all over again.

Andi may have been in DC 99% of the time but it didn't stop them from treading carefully so, just in case someone they knew spotted Toby looking too intimate with CJ in public. That part of their relationship - PDA and the likes - never was a big factor for them, but drinking in bars when a drunken CJ was an over affectionate CJ always seemed slightly risky.

Nonetheless, the next few weeks managed to sail on smoothly with them finally coming to terms with the fact they were together once more.

* * *

Things were going pretty well for the pair. That was until one day a few weeks into their relationship, CJ's friend Clara visited her wanting to talk.

"CJ hon, I've broken up with Mark." Mark was Clara's boyfriend with whom she had been living with once she had too returned to New York. "Can I move back in here with you?"

"Yeah, sure." CJ had replied sympathetically and hugged her. "Are you okay? What happened?"

"He was cheating on me." Clara said, eyes brimming with tears, and CJ felt her stomach twinge with guilt.

"Oh, Clara. I'm so sorry."

"We're better off apart anyway." She sighed before smiling slightly. "You're gonna have to take me out, now that we're both two single girls in New York."

CJ hadn't told her about her developing relationship with Toby, out of being unclear whether or not Clara actually knew Andi through her political contacts. She didn't want to take the risk, nor face the judgement of being with a married man, even if she was deeply falling for her best friend.

Toby was also due to be coming over that night, since she still felt uncomfortable about the idea of them being together at his place should Andi ever unexpectedly turn up. It seemed he had arrived early, unfortunately for the moment, as a knocking started on the door.

"I'll get it." She told Clara and paced to greet Toby at the door.

"Hi." He smiled, leaning in to kiss her.

Instead of the usual passionate greeting, she met his lips quickly. "Clara's moving in with me, she broke up with her boyfriend."

"Oh." Toby spoke up, "should I go?"

She nodded then started, "We're going out," She told him dejectedly, "She wants us 'single girls' to hit the town."

"Lucky you." He smirked. "Don't get too drunk."

"I can hold my liquor, thank you very much." She pouted.

"Okay." He took her hand in his, rubbing his thumb over her palm. "You know, you could pretend to pick up a guy, and just conveniently make your way over to mine."

"You do know that's betraying the sisterhood."

Toby rolled his eyes, "I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah. I'll call you later." She closed the space between them with another kiss, winding her free hand around his neck.

"Okay. See ya." He mumbled, pulling away and turned to head down the steps onto the sidewalk.

"Bye." She called back, heading back inside.

"Who was that?" Clara asked as she returned to the living room.

CJ didn't want to lie; besides Clara knew that they were good friends and it was unlikely she heard their conversation. "Toby."

"Oh, okay." She smiled back acceptingly.

* * *

The two women went out to a cocktail bar, dressed up to the nines and on Clara's part, planning to get insanely drunk.

Drinking with Toby had made CJ more of a heavyweight than Clara when it came to alcohol, but they both still ended up relatively tipsy after few drinks.

"I just need to find my rebound guy, you know?" Clara drawled, playing with an olive in her martini.

"Yeah." She had nodded in response.

"Did you find that with Jason? The need to go out and find a random guy to get over him?"

"No, can't say I did." CJ said with a smile.

"You should, girl!" Clara exclaimed loudly, "You need to find another guy to make you forget about him."

She resisted the urge to reply, "I already have", but shook her head with a grin.

"We weren't that close really, it wasn't a big loss. I've had much worse heartbreak than that, trust me." CJ said airily.

"When?" Clara pressed with intrigue.

She sighed deeply. "I'd been with this guy for nearly 3 years, but I broke up with him when I moved to LA because I didn't want to lose him through the distance. I thought we'd be okay, but he started seeing someone else. It completely crushed me: they got serious pretty quickly, and I was a wreck. Especially when they got married a couple of years back, I had to finally face I'd lost him. Why do you think I was so hard-working when I started at Emily's List?"

"I had no idea!" she gasped in response and CJ downed some of her drink, overwhelmed having talked for the first time with someone about losing Toby in the first place.

It hit her how lucky she was to have him back, back in her life and in her heart. Contorting her face at the inner cliché, she replied wistfully, "Yeah."

"Come on, let's go hit on guys." Clara gushed, easing up the mood.

"Fine." She obliged reluctantly and followed Clara to a couple of men along the bar.

"Toby, this is so embarrassing." CJ had gone outside a while after to phone Toby; Clara had hit it off with one of the men, John, while his friend ogled her not so discreetly and tried to sloppily kiss her in an uncomfortable manner.

"You said the guy's trying to kiss you?" he replied, a defensive edge to his voice.

"Yes. He's so disgusting though." She giggled back.

"How drunk are you?" he wondered.

A pause followed. "A little."

"Don't let him take advantage of you." He warned.

"You're forgetting that I don't need him because I have you." She said softly. "And since Clara's betraying the sisterhood, I might be able to too."

"I like the sound of that. Go back in, have some fun with your new friends." He sniggered down the line.

"Shut it, you. I'll come by later." She drew out the last words before hanging up and going back inside with a grin on her face.


	10. Called Out

**Part 10: Called Out**

_Somethin', somethin' about just knowing when it's right_

When CJ returned, Clara was almost on the guy's lap, which earned a disapproving glare.

"How you doing there, Clara?" she questioned sternly.

"I'm doing great! Mark who?" Clara exclaimed with a loud laugh, and a kiss on the cheek of her new companion.

"Oh god, girl." CJ muttered while she shook her head.

"Have some fun, Claudia!"

"I'm having fun." She shrugged, taking a sip of a new drink ordered for her by John's friend.

"Sure you are. Calling your boyfriend out there were you?" Clara laughed.

"No." she responded too curtly and defensively.

"Okaaay. I'm onto you, girl."

CJ sat back and sipped at her drink, observing the drunken antics of her friend with equal parts agitation and amusement, really wanting nothing more to be in Toby's presence.

It didn't take a lot longer before Clara had left with John and CJ had managed to shake off the disgusting friend, so she hailed a cab to Toby's apartment and began sobering up.

He welcomed her in with a lazy hug and lingering kiss.

"So did you have fun?" Toby asked her with a grin.

"I really did." She replied sarcastically. "Drinking without you is shitty, you know that?"

"I do." He quipped and pulled her in for another kiss.

"Andi called before." He muttered when they pulled away and CJ wrinkled her nose involuntarily which caused Toby to smile slightly.

"And I care because…?"

"She's moving the rest of her stuff out, like she was never here."

He led her by the hand into the living room where they sat down on the couch and resumed their intimacy.

"You sound awfully smug about that."

"It means you can come over here whenever you want."

"It would be a damn shame if I didn't want to come over here all the time." She teased,

"It would." Toby said against CJ's lips and they began making out fervently on the sofa.

* * *

The next morning they woke in one another's arms, a complete sense of ease with the realisation that they didn't need to rush or escape.

"Hey." CJ smiled as she met his sleepy gaze.

"Morning." He growled back softly.

"I don't want to go to work today." She moaned, nuzzling into him.

"Stay here, do that some more." He replied contently as her lips grazed his collarbone.

"Mmm, wish I could."

"You want breakfast?"

"Coffee's good."

"I don't think you've ever stayed long enough for breakfast."

Her lips moved to his mouth. "Things are changing."

"I'm glad."

"Me too. Fetch the coffee?"

"You don't have to be so demanding about it." He told her with mock-sternness.

"You love it, Ziegler."

"Whatever." He groaned as he ambled out of bed and made his way into the kitchen, CJ's eyes trailing his ass.

He returned shortly after with coffee and sat beside her in the bed. "How's the report for next week's event coming along?"

"I haven't actually been given it yet. I'm telling you, Jenny's a load of crap."

CJ had been promoted within her company already so wasn't directly dealing with Toby's work as had been initially the case. They saw each other less, but made up for it when he did swing by her office; much to the chagrin of CJ's poor assistant who had stumbled in accidentally one lunchtime.

"Demand it, CJ. We really need a good pair of eyes on this. If he can announce the reforms at the event, his points are going to be looking great for the next few weeks, guaranteed."

She looked at him after a taste of coffee. "I did, believe it or not. Still didn't get it; I thought being her boss entitled would entitle me to privileges such as having her obey my requests but apparently not."

"Give it some time, it's only been a couple of weeks." He said warmly.

"I suppose. Do you have a copy lying around anywhere here?"

"I might do in the study. Want me to go get it?"

"Nah, I will. I'll join you in the shower when I'm done." She smirked and hopped out of bed, leaving Toby to wonder how he had ended up so lucky this time.

* * *

Heading into work was a pleasant experience for the pair – they stopped to grab bagels as they braved the cold walk to CJ's office building. Toby was stopping by to check up on the media liaison department's work, which was with his communications department at the state office.

He left her with a squeeze of the hand, not wanting to attract any sort of PDA attention in the office, and both went about their days.

It occurred in the next few days to them both that they were becoming more comfortable with being together, chiefly in the way that Andi moving out had lifted a larger pressure off them. They both felt better relaxed acting like the couple they were, and CJ had been glad for Clara's usual absence from the apartment.

CJ returned home a couple of weeks later, however, to find Toby sitting on her couch and a perplexed Clara sitting on the chair by the window.

"Hey, guys." She spoke anxiously.

"CJ, I wanna see you in the kitchen." Clara told her. CJ looked at Toby who barely flinched.

Clara followed her into the kitchen where CJ rested against the counter, staring at her friend. "What's up, Clara?"

"You're seeing Toby, aren't you?" CJ was actually surprised it took her so long to realise and nodded vaguely.

"Yeah…" she wasn't in a position to deny it.

"Remind me, Ceej. Isn't he married? Doesn't he have a wife? A wife by the way I do know, and I guess you knew that so you decided not to tell me about these little shenanigans."

"It's not just an affair, Clara. Yes, he's married, but Andi lives in DC now and they're separated anyway. Did she happen to tell you that she's only stringing him along in a barely-there marriage so that her political career doesn't take a dive?"

"That's not the point and you know it."

"What? Yes I was sceptical going into it because I didn't want to get hurt, but it's Toby; he's my best friend and I love him. I don't care about any of the baggage, hell we've got enough of that between us to last a lifetime. Don't judge me on this, Clara."

"Fine, fine. You know what you're doing. I don't like you and your boyfriend completely shacking up in an extra-marital affair here all the time."

"It's not, it's not that." CJ warned and walked out back to Toby.

* * *

"We're going out." She told him.

"We are?" he asked, rather confused with her swift movements.

"I'm not staying in the same house as her right now," she declared and the venom in her voice surprised Toby.

They were stood outside before he replied. "What did she say?"

"She knows we're together, and she knows Andi." His face grew slightly paler. "Don't worry, she's not going to tell her. Anyway, she's attacking me for getting involved with you because she thinks I know better but who the hell is she to question my relationships?"

CJ had become enraged and Toby held her arms, calming her down. "Don't let her get to you okay? What does she know?"

"It's not the point, Toby." Her voice started breaking and she tried to avoid his eyes.

He didn't know how to reply, so simply kissed her tenderly; the hold on her arms softened.

"Let's go home."

She couldn't help smiling the smallest bit at his casual reference to his apartment as home. "Okay."

They arrived there and spent the night for the first time in a long time barely even touching alcohol; just sitting in bed alternating between talking and reading to each other with the occasional fooling around.

"What happens if Andi wants you back?" CJ quietly questioned.

"Trust me, that isn't going to happen." He reassured her, holding back the "I'm never letting you go again," that bubbled beneath the surface.

"You don't know that." She sighed back.

"You're letting Clara get to you, aren't you?"

"I don't want to…" she started but he cut her off with a kiss.

"I'm never getting back with Andi. I want you and only you."

"I love you." She blurted out rather softly, but her eyes betrayed her as she realised what she had said.

Toby kissed her deeply before looking her firmly in the eyes. "I love you too."

"Yeah?" she titled her head, emotion filling her expression.

"There's no point in trying to deny it," he shrugged, voice passionate.

Their lips met once more, ferocious yet compassionate.


	11. Further Ramifications

**Part 11: Further Ramifications**

_Muscle cars drove a truck right through my heart_

"She's not talking to me." CJ told Toby at work the next day - having been home after leaving his place that morning.

"Really?" He asked incredulously.

"No word of a lie, Tobus." She replied.

"A bit pathetic of her, isn't it?"

"She'll come round."

"I'm sensing she doesn't feel the Ziegler vibe."

"No-one feels that vibe. It's a non-existent vibe."

"You're meant to be a bit more supportive."

"I'm the one with the roommate giving me the silent treatment, calm down."

"I'm hurt, Claudia Jean."

"You'll get over it, Tobias." She retorted, earning a glare.

"So what are you going to do about her?"

"Nothing. I don't need her approval to be with you."

"I should hope not."

"You're stuck with me I'm afraid."

"I'll cope. Only barely mind."

"Okay."

"Go work now."

"Sure, I'm leaving."

"Get out."

Toby smiled "bye" and trailed out the door.

Several days passed and Clara was still reluctant to engage in a rational conversation with CJ due to her disapproval; the silent phase now turning into a series of arguments between the pair.

"Clara's still pissed with me." CJ announced casually down the phone.

"Come stay with me, then. You're here all the time anyway." Toby responded back.

"I know but how long is she going to be like this?"

"It's her own petty fault. She's only sensitive because her boyfriend cheated on her and she's probably comparing you to her rival bitch."

"You really know how to cheer a girl up, Tobus."

"I'm not calling you a bitch."

"I never said you were."

"Stay here and keep out of the way of the real bitchy one."

CJ snorted.

"Or we could spend every waking minute having sex all over your apartment, see how she likes you then."

"I'd very much like that, might be a bit exhausting though."

"It would prove a point."

"Nice try, Pokey."

"I have to go, our own bitch is on the other line."

"Goodbye Toby, don't get too frustrated with her."

"I can't promise anything. Love you, yeah?"

"Love you."

* * *

By spring, CJ and Toby were at last content with their situation. Andi may have been their underlying problem but she barely even made contact with Toby, let alone pose a real threat to their happiness.

It all changed however when she arrived unexpectedly in town because she needed Toby to attend a gala with her for her congressional district.

"You have to be freaking kidding me, Andrea!" he had bellowed when she turned up at the apartment. "You're never here, don't even call, and you think I can drop everything and play the happy couple at some stupid function?!"

"I know it isn't ideal…" she muttered but he held a hand up in interruption.

"No! It is anything but ideal. Do your constituents have any idea how practically non-existent our marriage is?!"

"No, but…"

"Yes, exactly. I suppose that's why you want me there, yes?"

"Yes, Toby."

"I'm not going."

"Yes, you are."

"I'm not a child, you can't order me around."

"Hell I can."

"Andrea…" his voice rose with frustration.

"You are coming to this function with me as my husband whether you like it or not."

He finally became defeated. "Do not expect me to display any sign of enjoyment for attending."

"Okay." She agreed reluctantly.

He arrived at CJ's apartment once Andi had departed and told her the disappointing news.

"You're what?!" she cried when he had explained the full story.

"You heard me." He uttered.

"You're actually going?"

"Yes." He said bluntly.

"Do you know how stupid this will make us look? People are aware of us, you know."

"I know."

"And then you're going back off with your wife for a public spectacle? It's going to look fantastic, Toby."

"I have thought about this."

"I don't think you have."

"CJ, I'm sorry. This is the first time in months she's asked for something though, we've been lucky."

"Oh well if that's the case, of course we can oblige to it! Shove it up your ass, Toby."

"CJ…" he began to defend himself but her glare cut him off.

"Leave."

He would've protested but the exhaustion in her voice scared him. "I'm sorry." He murmured as he made his exit and left an emotional CJ in despair in her apartment.

* * *

The event was the next night and Toby made his appearance for Andi, much to CJ's dismay.

They only barely managed to sort things out the night after that; Toby was worried about CJ's unhappiness about anything regarding Andi anymore, especially as she didn't make an effort to hide it like she once had.

CJ had decided to stay over anyway, because she did miss him, but he told her he had an idea and that she should wait for him there. Obviously she was confused, but curious so obliged.

Toby made his way to Andi's hotel, his mind was made up: he was demanding to Andi they file for divorce, their separation finally withering out for good because he had waited around long enough and CJ wasn't going to suffer anymore because of him.

"Toby, what a surprise." Andi exclaimed bitterly as she opened her door to him.

"Andrea." He stated as he walked in. "We need to talk."

"What about?" she wondered curiously.

"We're getting a divorce."

"To hell we are!"

"You have been dragging out this separation for months now and I'm fed up of it! We're through!"

"There's someone else isn't there?" she snapped.

Toby tried not to look too astounded. "I never said that, did I?"

"You would never try and get out of this marriage otherwise!" she yelled in response.

"You really think you know me so well that you can identify the justifications of my actions?!"

"Yes, Toby!"

"Fuck you."

"Where the hell do you get off talking to you wife like that?!"

Toby laughed angrily, "Where the hell do you get off treating your husband like crap?!"

"What? I love you!"

"No you don't! I don't love you either, can't say I really ever did!"

"You piece of shit." She barked and picked up the nearest decorative vase from a side table, hurling it towards the wall where Toby stood; his ducking just escaping injury.

"I thought you could be rational about this but obviously not."

Andi laughed rather bitterly at his words. "You're an idiot."

"I'm leaving." Toby sighed, "I'm calling my lawyer tomorrow and getting this done properly."

He walked out, leaving a furious and sobbing Andi staring at the broken vase pieces around the room.


	12. Starting Over

**Part 12: Starting Over**

_Somethin', somethin' 'bout lonely nights and my lipstick on your face_

Toby walked into his apartment. His dark apartment, so he figured CJ hadn't waited up. He went into the bedroom, she lay curled up on her side fast asleep and the vision of peace – a stark contrast to her recent moods. He pulled off his tie and leaned down to kiss her forehead as he sat in the space beside her.

"How was it?" she mumbled, feeling his presence but still half in slumber.

"She was mad, she threw things." Toby shuddered at the visual of his soon-to-be ex-wife hurling a vase across the room.

"I'm sorry." She said quietly.

"I'm not." He smiled as he watched CJ drift back to sleep, snuggling into his side.

"TOBIAS ZACHARY ZIEGLER GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE RIGHT NOW!" the screams of Andrea Wyatt filled the apartment mere minutes later, causing both Toby and CJ to almost jump out of bed.

"What the hell is she doing here?!" Toby growled.

"She sounds pissed." CJ winced, not prepared to face Andi.

He stormed out of the bedroom to find a drunken Andi pacing around the living room.

"There you are! Where's the little slut then?!" she yelled.

"Don't call her that! And how the hell did you get in?!" Toby fumed.

"Well she is a home-wrecker, and because this was once my apartment too if you hadn't remembered!" her eyes blazed with fury.

"You're drunk, Andi." Toby sighed.

"Oh there she is!" Andi pointed towards CJ who was watching from the bedroom door. "Why am I not surprised? Hello CJ."

She remained quiet, watching Andi intently.

"Whatcha scared of, honey?" she taunted, noticing the silence.

"Shut the fuck up, Andi." CJ muttered.

"Oh, she's a doll Toby. I can totally see why you left me for her." She chuckled bitterly.

"Don't be a bitch, Andrea." He snapped.

"No, no. She can call me whatever she likes." CJ smiled, too sweetly for Andi.

"What do you see in her, Toby?! Really?" Andi shouted.

"She's a better woman than you'll ever be." Toby retorted.

CJ smiled to herself, noticing the shade of red Andi was becoming.

* * *

"You're a fucking asshole you know, Toby?" she was furious.

"Then you should be glad to see the back of me!" Why are you even here?"

"I wanted to get a good look at the reason I'm getting divorced." She turned, glaring at CJ.

"It's not like you loved him anyway." CJ declared.

"You don't know anything." Andi whispered.

"Give her some credit, Andrea. Everyone knows you married me because the Maryland 5th would never nominate a single woman, being the beacon of family values and all!" Toby proclaimed.

"Fuck you, Toby." She responded. "Don't bring my constituents into this."

"You brought them into our marriage!" he shouted. "I love CJ and I always have, I thought you were like her but boy, I was wrong. Now can you please leave, you've embarrassed yourself enough for one night."

"You can't kick me out." She spat out.

"Oh hell I can." Toby ushered her to the door.

Andi reached the door, before slapping Toby across the cheek.

"You deserve each other." She spoke bluntly before stepping out, slamming the door almost off its hinges on the way out.

"Wow. I almost feel bad for being jealous of that bitch." CJ chuckled as she brushed her thumb over Toby's newly red cheek, the past hurt not fully absent from her tone.

Toby wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. "You have no idea how sorry I am I married her."

"Don't. You got me back eventually." CJ pressed her forehead to his, resting in an intimate moment.

"I love you so much," Toby smiled.

"I love you too, more." She closed the space between them with a kiss. "Now we won't have any interruptions, I can show you just how much."

Toby could only muster up a groan as he followed her into the bedroom.

* * *

Wanting to ensure the process went as smoothly as possible, Toby visited a divorce lawyer to begin proceedings the next day.

Andi, on the other hand, was worrying about the influence of the divorce on her political position, so was eager to prolong the procedure as much as possible – much to the chagrin of CJ and Toby.

"How do you suppose she's going to play this out then?" CJ asked Toby one evening between kisses.

"I'm going to be the vicious husband no doubt." He muttered in reply, not really in the mood for talking.

She placed a kiss on his throat, "You're going to be glad you don't care what people think of you."

"Damn right." He replied and she suppressed a smirk, looking into his eyes.

"You do know you're going to be depicted as the mistress? For which I apologise as I'm sure as hell Andi won't."

"Yeah..." CJ drew back and he observed her sudden change in manner.

"What?" he wondered.

"Nothing." She smiled weakly and moved to kiss him again.

"I need to meet David." He reminded her, pulling away.

"Oh yeah, I forgot. Have fun."

Toby got up from the bed, grabbing his coat on the way out. "See you later."

"Bye." She murmured softly.

Toby left their apartment and walked onto the sidewalk, to Barry's where his and CJ's life had restarted, in order to meet his brother.

As soon as he entered, David spotted him and walked to meet him. "Hey, David."

"Toby! Hey, man." He hugged Toby and pulled away. "Why have you got lipstick all over?"

"Ceej." Toby muttered, rubbing his cheek as they headed to order beers.

The brothers sat at a table, beers freshly opened, and David watched him. "How's the dreaded wife then?"

"We're getting divorced." Toby said simply, holding up his bare left hand.

"About time! I bet CJ's thrilled. Probably explains the lipstick everywhere." David replied with a smirk; Toby had told his brother about their relationship a few weeks prior.

He ignored the comment. "She will be once it's over. I'm somewhat surprised, and fucking glad, that she's still around."

"She loves you man, of course she's going to see it through with you."

"Yeah, you're right." Toby stated.

* * *

"How did Andi finally come round to it then? I figured with the separation going on for so long that she'd be reluctant." David wondered some time later.

"I just told it to her straight." He merely replied.

"Even about CJ?"

"No, no. But she came over drunk later that night, found CJ obviously, and wasn't too surprised." Toby explained.

"It's not a tough case to crack with you two." David smiled, knowing how deeply his brother loved CJ.

Toby waved his hand airily, "Yeah well, I'm not screwing things up again."

"I'm glad to hear it, she's definitely a keeper."

"You're telling me," he grumbled with a smile.

"I forgot to tell you, Sarah's pregnant again." David beamed.

Toby looked at him in shock, "What?! Why didn't you open with that? Congratulations man!"

He shook his brother's hand, their sitting positions making it hard to embrace, and smiled relaxingly.

"How far along is she?"

"14 weeks." David grinned, "Want to see a sonogram photo?"

"Of course." Toby replied.

He gazed at the image once David had fished it from his wallet; there was always something about the intricate details of a sonogram he admired.

"You and CJ ever going to have kids?" David asked, snapping Toby out of his daze.

"What?" he let out an anxious chuckle.

"You've never thought about kids?" David repeated.

"We've only been together a few months, marriage isn't even on the cards yet."

"You'd want to marry her though, right?"

"In a heartbeat. But she doesn't want that, that was one of the reasons we broke up the first time around."

"Shit, really?"

"Yes, really." Toby said curtly, trying not to let the past overshadow his emotions.

"Things have changed, though." He reminded him.

Toby laughed, "I'm still in the middle of ending my first marriage, no need for me to go rushing straight into another one."


	13. An Approach

**Part 13: An Approach**

_Baby I'd rather die, without you and I_

"Hello?" Toby heard CJ walk in the front door, one night in early May, while making a sandwich.

"Yeah, Toby?" CJ called through the apartment, unable to find her boyfriend.

"What? I was in here." he came out of the kitchen with a sandwich in his hand.

"Mark's bringing Hogan to New York on the 17th," she explained, "He has some work thing here so I'm babysitting, although she's a teenager."

"Okay, cool." He replied plainly.

"Whoa, calm down. Your enthusiasm is overwhelming." She retorted.

Toby shrugged, "I'm guessing you won't mind missing that State gala I'm being dragged to then?"

"It that the 17th?" he nodded, "I'm sorry, I know you hate those things."

"I'll cope." He muttered and finished the remains of his sandwich as they walked into the living room.

CJ leaned on the wall, chuckling at the way he was evidently pouting as he sat on the couch.

"State events aren't that bad, Tobus." She pointed out.

"You like to schmooze though, and you always look stunning so people are naturally nice to you. I grumble in the corner and don't make an effort to look interesting." He moaned.

"You look hot in your tux though," she flirted.

"Try telling that to the 60 year old political minds of the state." He said dryly.

"I'll just be persuasive."

"They'd love that."

"I aim to please," CJ grinned.

"Yeah, good job you're not coming really. They'd be ogling you all night." He sighed.

"And someone would be jealous of that?" she pressed playfully, sitting beside him.

"It shocks me that you feel the need to ask that question when the answer is so obvious." He said, a small smile playing on his lips.

* * *

The 17th came and Toby was in attendance at the New York State event, an uncomfortable black tie affair he had desperately wanted CJ to attend if it wasn't for her visiting brother and niece.

The night was boring and he resorted to scotch to get by, only wanting to be back at home. It was late when he realised his speech has already been given and he continued to linger around the bar with a melancholy disposition.

"Toby Ziegler?" Toby heard a gruff voice speak his name.

He turned to see the face of Leo McGarry, the Secretary of Labour, standing behind him.

"Mr McGarry, good to meet you," the pair shook hands.

"Likewise, I've met Andrea on several occasions." He noted and Toby winced slightly, causing him to smile. "I know, I heard you're getting divorced. Sorry about that."

"Thanks. It was pretty imminent."

"Yeah?" Toby nodded. "Let's cut to the chase. I have a proposition for you."

"You do?" Toby wondered.

"You know Jed Bartlet, Governor of New Hampshire?"

"Yeah, he's done some good stuff up there."

"He has. How'd you like to come join us as a junior speechwriter?"

"What for? He has a team, surely."

Leo gestured him to move to a quieter space. "I'm thinking of a potential campaign for the Democratic nominee for the presidency. How does Bartlet for America '98 sound?"

"You're serious?" Toby asked in quiet astonishment.

"Yes."

"Why me? You know I have a terrible track record with campaigns."

"Andi suggested you. I know you have a strained relationship with that estranged ex-wife of yours but she still respects your politics and I like your work irrespective."

"I'm not sure." Toby hesitated but Leo's stare was persuading. "I'll come up for a few days, see how it is. I was in favour of the State education reports he backed, maybe there's more in him than I thought."

"Trust me, there is. You won't regret this, Toby," he was told. "I'll contact you with details tomorrow; my office will send them over."

"Thank you, sir." Toby nodded graciously and watched in surprise as McGarry walked off.

* * *

He returned home that night and told CJ of the news as they were curled up on the sofa in the dark light of the apartment; she was exhausted from her day and he was slightly intoxicated from all the scotch he had consumed.

Toby watched as her hair cascaded over his chest as she collapsed back against him.

"Are you okay?" He muttered hesitantly.

"You're leaving me for New Hampshire, Toby. I'm just fine and dandy." The bitterness in her tone masked her sorrow.

"I won't be there long. I only told McGarry I would go and check out the Governor because of those reports they released up there for education reform."

"You're going to be there a while."

"How do you know that?

"I heard the voicemail Andi left for you telling you how excellent an opportunity it is, to have you smooching with the likes of them in the face of the divorce."

"She called?"

"Yeah, Toby. She's still stringing you along and you're falling in step with her mind-games."

"I am not."

"You tell yourself that, Tobus."

"CJ, I'm serious."

"Sure you are."

"Listen to me. Andi gave me the opportunity, yes. But McGarry said he liked my work irrespective of my estranged ex-wife. He said those words, too. People know we're not together anymore, the perfect image she thinks they believe we are."

"So I don't have to worry?"

"No you don't." He said with a kiss to her temple.

"I love you." She murmured.

"I love you too, Ceej." He whispered back.

"I'm still mad at you for leaving me."

"I'll make it up to you." He said dulcetly.

"A vibrator for while you're gone might do the trick." She smirked.

"I was trying to be sincere, but you go ahead with your filth." He smirked back and kissed her, almost chuckling as she smiled into his mouth.

"I'm kidding, nothing will do the trick." She said slyly.

"So I've ruined you for battery-operated devices? Poor woman."

His mocking tone earned a smile, "Impossible man."

* * *

The next week, Toby was set to leave to fly up to New Hampshire to meet with Leo McGarry.

"I'm not going to be here forever." He reminded CJ for the hundredth time as she drove him to the airport.

"Yeah, I know." She pouted and eased back into their comfortable silence.

When they arrived, she sat with him in the small coffee area to wait for his flight to be called.

"You sure you're up to house-sitting?" he laughed as he stirred his coffee.

"Don't call it that. I practically live with you, Pokey." She replied.

Toby chuckled, "Do you even remember what your apartment looks like?"

"It's Clara's, technically." she reminded him. "I may go back and surprise her to keep me entertained while you're gone."

"Do you want me to find your body in a ditch on my return?"

CJ smirked over the rim of her coffee cup, "Melodramatic much?"

"Good job I don't have any life in the apartment that would suffer at the hands of Clara's brutal murder spree."

"I hope you're not referring to me as merely life." She warned.

"I meant pets, goldfish."

"You wouldn't need Clara to kill your fish; I'd probably do it anyway. I'm useless with pets." She explained.

"Good job I don't, then." He commented.

"Yeah." She grinned, moving the cup to her lips.

His flight was soon announced and the pair stood to embrace.

"Call me when you get there, okay?" she murmured, going to kiss him.

"Yes, ma'am." He replied sarcastically when they pulled away.

"I'll miss you," CJ told him softly.

"Me too. I love you." He said before one last kiss.

"Love you too, Tobus. Get going."

They moved out of each other's arms, Toby placing a solitary kiss on her cheek before walking away and leaving a helpless CJ standing alone in LaGuardia.


End file.
